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Mental Health as told by Makayla, junior Journalism Major.
Mental Health is the most craziest, realest thing no one ever told me about until I got to college. I mean, I started having seasonal depression in high school but I had never been through so many emotional roller coasters until I got to college. It came in full throttle and occurred more often.
So let's get into it. For one, college is something new and fresh and obviously something to adapt to. I had to figure out who MaKayla was while also trying to get to know other people so I won’t be that antisocial college student. With that, I had to figure out who my group of friends was going to be because, you know your friends are representations of yourself and what not. I had to learn and understand things I would and won’t tolerate. You know, too much. And honestly, growing in all aspects felt like a crazy roller coaster ride.
College itself is bittersweet. I love the independence but hate what comes with independence. It made me feel helpless at times. Mainly alone, neglected. You know, we all feel that pride of not wanting to share what is going on with us because we don’t want to be a burden to people or we want people to really get to know who we are. "We"... I’m the "WE." I hate knowing the fact that people know certain things about me, but I’ve came to realize how liberating that can be instead of going through stuff by myself. Cuz I gotta learn the hard way right?
But also, this “independent” woman means that I have to talk to people. I hate confrontation. I’m the first person to be like, “Ok so what can I do to make this right so we don’t have to talk about it ever again?” or “ Can you just text it to me?"
Chillleee, thank God for friends that have pushed me out of that and convinced me that they have my best interest and care about my heart and mind. They showed me that all of my emotions are normal and that it is ok to feel this way, and that it’s okay to ask for help. I started to ask myself, "Do you really have to go through this alone, or are you being stubborn to see how strong you are by hurting yourself more?" Low and behold, I don’t have to do it alone, Look At God.
Having these great things doesn’t negate the fact that I still have bad days of feeling like it’s me against the world. So how do I deal with all this you may ask?
Sitting in front of the mirror watching myself cry cause I’m crazy. (Am I the only person who do that?) Or putting on sad songs in the shower so I can have one of those gut wrenching cries for that good sleep in the end.
Now, I didn’t say my coping mechanisms weren't dramatic lol. They do help me release though so I can get right back to it. What I did find helpful was being in a good environment with people who care about me, who encourage me to talk through my feelings, and cling to the Lord whenever I have to square up with myself mentally.
Okay okay, I'm crazy, you crazy, we all crazy. We just have to figure out what works best for us when managing our craziness so we not out here popping off or just shutting ourselves out to the world.
Ok Hunnnyyy!!! Be great and crazy, all that!
-Kayla Baeee